RE: Dear Santa Hardspiker.........I called investor relations at the North Pole and spoke to Santa this morning. I was surprised he took my call, as this is a very busy day for him, but my large holdings in all things related to Christmas gives me a special "in" with the big fella.
Apparently, the SSP (Santa Secret Police) aren't in agreement with your statement that you were a good boy. They did cite several infractions, while seeming minor at first glance, overall paint you in a very bad light.
Farting in an elevator full of seniors, parking in the handicapped section at the gym, always shorting the girl at the Tim Hortons drive thru by two pennies on your double double............this is just unacceptable.
I did more checking with the SSP and it's looks like mallgirl, myself and a few others on this board have done enough good things to offest your atrocious behavior........Santa didn't promise anything but he did give a deep chuckle when I asked him if my SLAM stocking was going to be filled this year.
Merry Christmas everyone and make sure you do some random act of kindness today!